When I returned from my trip from sunny, warm Orlando I was quickly tossed back into my real-life reality.
A mound of dishes needed to be wash.
Spotted kitchen floor screaming to be mopped.
Master bedroom too in desperate need to be cleaned.
Clothes to fold.
Clothes to wash.
Food to prep for dinner.
Grocery shopping to complete.
My unforgiving list was full-to-overflowing of things I needed to conquer immediately from my mini business vacation away.
Boy did it hit me hard in the pit of my being. A striking feeling of “What an awful house keeper I was.”
As my mind took me to the shameful thoughts of, “Man, am I really an example I would like my girls to follow?”, I couldn’t stop the flowing rivers of concerns from flooding my mind:
I’m a keeper of my home that don’t like cooking. But loves cleaning. 🙂
I’m a keeper of my home that on some days I just don’t care to pick. up. one. more. thing.
I’m a keeper of my home that really and truly don’t do it right each and every day.
Interestingly, at that exactly moment I thought, “If only I was perfect.”
(We women can have a bazillion thoughts a second, I do believe.)
If I was perfect then they would have *perfect* shoes to follow after which would make them in turn be the *perfect* keeper of their homes.
Right after those thoughts the Lord ministered to me straight away without missing a beat.
(You know He knows all of our thoughts.)
He whispered, “I didn’t call you to be perfect. If you were perfect then you wouldn’t need to point them (my girls) to Me, the Perfector of their faith. The One who they need to run to. They’d run to you. Not Me”
Wow!!! I never reflected upon that point.
So often we as Moms, parents, look at our imperfections.
We name them one by one by one!
We sometimes head-long fall into a dazzling and captivating pity party where the enemy of our joy and peace has invited us to and regretfully accept the invitation and we abandonly party along with him. For a while.
Well, as quick as those thoughts came, I quickly identified them from whom they came.
I resolved that day that as long as I am on this side of heaven I DON’T want to be perfect.
If, while living in this flesh, I am perfect, then I don’t need my Savior.
I mean really what would I need Him for.
I can do all that is needed or desired on my own.
In my own strength.
In my own power.
In my own reasoning.
If I were the perfect homeschool teacher why would I ever need to run to the Lord for help.
Why?
Of course I wouldn’t.
Scripture teaches clearly from 2 Corinthians 12:9
” But He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.”
Normally, in all honestly, I have no problem recognizing and admitting my imperfections.
That I don’t have it all together.
That I don’t do things right.
That I strive to honor God and obey His Word and live with a testimony that’s pleasing and honoring to His Name.
That’s my boast!
But every now and then the enemy tactfully tries to get me tangled up in a bunch of *hoopla* to bring me down.
Or to bring focus upon myself which then catapults me into an elevations of pride and arrogance.
Well, after I had that moment on Sunday and the Lord straight away spoke to me I realized that I desire to do all that I do as unto the Lord. Period.
That I do want to live as an example before my four daughters and my sons of a godly woman.
But as a godly woman that NEEDS THE SAVIOR!!!
So, I don’t want to live PERFECT. Because in doing so I then take all of their focus off the Lord and their striving towards God off of Him. And Him alone!!
Ohhhhh…Yuck!!!
To be perfect on this side of heaven takes all the glory from God.
It takes all the *need* for Him away.
It brings focus to me.
It brings the glory to me.
Oh, how I want so much more for my children than just seeing a perfect mother that they should *emulate.*
I desire all the more for them to see my weakness. I want them to see me crying out to the Lord for help.
Because it’s only in HIM where HIS grace is sufficient and HIS greatness revealed in my weakness (imperfection.) is the prize.
So I resolve to just leave Perfection right where it belongs and that’s not with me.
Ephesians 3:20
“Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us.”
I earnestly want my children to learn one of the greatest lessons.
That to be perfect steals all the glory from God.
And that’s not what we want…….at all.
Blessings in Abundance.
Angela is wife of one, mother of 8
SCHEA board member